Blessings at Home

Menu Plan Monday - 6/10-6/17

It's been a rough week for our family and we are ready for it to be over with.

Slowly, but surely, life is getting back to normal.

I figured the best way to start out our week is to have a menu plan in place so at least that amount of craziness can cease...

Drew and I decided a few weeks that we wanted our family to start eating clean and get healthy. Some of the following days include "clean" meals whereas some of them do not. It's a process that will take our family some time to get used to it so we are moving slow for now.

Sunday - (over with)

Monday - B: Granola Cereal, Milk, Cantaloupe

L: (At the church after Ma's funeral)

D: Steak/Squash Kebobs, Baked Potatoes

S: Popcorn

Tuesday - B: Fried egg, Toast, Fruit

L: Bean and Cheese Tortilla Roll-Up

D: Grilled Chicken, Rice, Stewed Squash

S: Hard-Boiled Egg/Popcorn

Wednesday - B: Whole Wheat Waffles, Syrup, Fruit

L: Grilled Cheese Sandwich, Pretzels

D: Steak Fajitas, Homemade Refried Beans, Rice

S: Homemade Granola Bars

Thursday - B: Popovers, Eggs, Bacon

L: Salad/Sandwich

D: Whole Chicken in Crockpot, Brown Rice, Zucchini Chips

S: Cheese, Fruit

Friday - B: Pb&J Smoothie, Whole Wheat Biscuits

L: Brown Rice, Avocado, Soy Sauce

D: Jambalaya

S: Homemade Granola Bars

Saturday - B: Breakfast Casserole Bites

L: Sandwich, Fruit

D: Seafood Gumbo, Rice

S: Popcorn

So that's a look at what we will be eating this week! I'm going to go grocery shopping sometime tomorrow and will be taking note of the prices at my stores to see how much healthier eating will affect our food budget (positively/negatively).

Have you tried "Clean Eating"? Any great recipe sites you'd like to recommend?

Here are a few resources that I've found so far:

The Eat Clean Diet

Clean Eating Magazine

The Gracious Pantry

365 Days of Clean Eating

Clean Eating Chelsey

Clean Eating Online

I sometimes link up at these places.

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Taking a Break...

It seems when one thing goes wrong, a million other things follow suit. Don't get me wrong, I have tons of things to be thankful for right now but my family is going through a really rough time.

For the time being, I'm going to take a blogging break to be with my family and help in any way that I can.

We are dealing with a few different issues right now that need my attention.

If you don't mind, please say a prayer for our family for healing, understanding, wisdom, patience...just life in general...

Thanks so much.

I'll occasionally be popping over on Facebook so that's where you can find me for now!

Thanks for understanding and giving any support you can!

The Love Dare -Day Six

Day Six - Love is not irritable

I realize this is two days late and I'm really sorry. I didn't take into consideration how busy we were going to be trying to get Drew ready to go out of town...so I didn't have time to write or do the dares. From now on I will write the post the night before and update with my progress from the previous day's dare later.

He who is slow to anger is better than the might, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city.

Proverbs 16:32

Some people never pass up the opportunity to get upset with their spouse when something goes wrong. {Honestly, I'm guilty of this -sometimes.} They take full advantage of expressing how hurt or frustrated they are. This reaction is the opposite one of love.

"To be irritable means "to be be near the point of a knife". Not far from being poked. People who are irritable are locked, loaded, and ready to overreact." The Love Dare, pg. 26

Love is not supposed to turn angry under pressure and minor problems should not give way to major reactions. Love does not get hurt unless there is a legitimate reason in the eyes of God. In a loving marriage, both people should remain calm and patient, give grace and show mercy, restrain from their temper, and exercise self-control.

There are at least two main reasons that contribute to someone becoming irritable:

1.Stress - Stress drains every area of your body and life -energy, health, happiness. It is brought on by many different things and causes relational problems such as arguing and division. We often inflict this one ourselves by depriving our bodies of rest, nutrition, and exercise. We have to balance and prioritize what life hands us to keep from being irritable and stressed out!

The Bible teaches us:

a. To avoid unhealthy stress by letting love guide our relationships so we aren't caught up in arguments. (Colossians 3:12-14 - ¹²Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. ¹³Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. ¹⁴And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.)
b. To pray through your anxieties instead of tackling them on your own. (Philippians 4:6-7 - ⁶Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.)

c. To delegate when you are overworked. (Exodus 18:17-23 -¹⁷Moses’ father-in-law replied, “What you are doing is not good. ¹⁸You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. ¹⁹Listen now to me and I will give you some advice, and may God be with you. You must be the people’s representative before God and bring their disputes to him. ²⁰Teach them his decrees and instructions, and show them the way they are to live and how they are to behave. ²¹But select capable men from all the people—men who fear God, trustworthy men who hate dishonest gain —and appoint them as officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. ²²Have them serve as judges for the people at all times, but have them bring every difficult case to you; the simple cases they can decide themselves. That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. ²³If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.”

d. To avoid overindulgence. (Proverbs 25:16 - If you find honey, eat just enough—too much of it, and you will vomit.)

e. To take a "Sabbath" vacations day every week for worship and rest. This allows you time to recharge and refocus for your week.

2. Selfishness - The heart of the problem is usually a problem of the heart. Being easily angered is an indicator that a hidden factor is present where love is supposed to be. It can also take on other faces:

Lust - being ungrateful for what you have and wanting something that you can't have. (James 4:1-3)
Bitterness - comes in when you respond to something in a judgmental way and refuse to work through your anger. (Ephesians 4:31)
Greed - will frustrate you with unfulfilled desires. (1 Timothy 6:9-10)
Pride - leads you to act harshly in order to protect your ego.

These negative motivators can never be satisfied but when love enters your heart, it calms you down and inspires you to quit focusing on yourself. It helps you let go of unnecessary things. Love will lead you to forgive rather than hold a grudge. It encourages you to be happy for others and lowers your stress. Love sets up your heart to respond to your spouse with patience and encouragement all the time.

Today's Dare

Choose today to react to touch circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life.

Where do you need to add margin to your life? When have you recently overreacted? What was your real motivation behind it? What decisions have you made today?

Comment when you complete today's dare!!

{Day 5 Dare for me - Drew says I'm a procrastinator and forgetful. This is not the first time he has told me that so I didn't react in a negative way. I've been working very hard trying to change these things about myself for awhile. I keep a notebook nearby most of the time to jot down things I need to remember to do and also write down when it needs to be done...then cross it off once completed!}

The Love Dare - Day Five

Day Five - Love is Not Rude

He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him.

Proverbs 27:14

Nothing irritates people as quickly as someone being rude. Being rude is saying or doing unnecessarily unpleasant things for other people to be be around. In marriage this could be anything embarrassing or irritating like a foul mouth, poor table manners, or habitual sarcastic comments. Any way you look at, no one likes being around a rude person.

Love has something to say about this. In the beginning of a relationship both men and women are driven by intentionally behaving in way that is pleasant for the other person to be around. Each person purposefully avoids things that frustrate the other.

Genuine love minds its manners.

Embracing this ONE concept could add some nice air to your marriage. Good manners express to our spouse that we value them enough to exercise some self-control while around them. You can restore honor to your marriage by allowing love to change your behavior. People with good manners are also more respected by all others around them.

We tend to have better manners when others are around than when it's just us and our spouse. You may be grumpy or pout-y until a friend calls or stops by then suddenly we are all happy-go-lucky. If you dare to love your spouse then you will want to give your best to them all the time.

Women and men think a lot differently on what types of manners really matter. One thinks burping at the dining table is okay while the other finds it repulsive. The other thinks arguing is simply a way to communicate differing opinions while the other finds it mean. Women need to remember King Solomon's wise words in Proverbs 25:24 where he says, "Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife." Likewise, men need to learn the important lesson found in Psalm 112:5 that says, "It is well with the man who is gracious." We need to learn what is appropriate and adjust our behaviors accordingly.

There are two main reasons why people are rude: ignorance and selfishness. Neither of these is good of course. Living with either of these can make you unpleasant to be around much less to live with.

Test yourself with the following questions:

1. How does your spouse feel about the way you speak and act around them?

2. How does your behavior affect your spouse's sense of worth and self-esteem?

3. Would your husband or wife say you're a blessing, or that you're condescending and embarrassing?

If you think that your spouse is the one who needs work in this area, you're likely suffering from ignorance and selfishness. Remember love lifts you to a higher standard. Do you wish your spouse would quit doing the things that bother you? Then it's time to stop doing the things that bother them. Be considerate enough to find out and avoid the behaviors that cause life to be unpleasant for your spouse. Be delightful.

Here are three guiding principles when it comes to practicing good manners in your marriage:

1. Guard the Golden Rule: Treat them the way you want to be treated. [Luke 6:31 - Do to others as you would have them do to you.]

2. No double standards: Be as considerate to your spouse as you would to anyone else.

3. Honor requests: Consider what your spouse already asked you to do (or not do). If you are unsure, then ask.

Today's Dare:

Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is from their perspective only.

What things did your spouse point out about you that need your attention? How did you handle hearing it? What do you plan to do to improve these areas?

{Yesterday's Dare for Me: I called Drew while he was at work and asked him if there was anything I could do for him. He said I could wash some of his clothes that he would need to take out of town with him. (I had already done this prior to calling him.) I learned that my husband is sometimes reluctant to ask me to do things for him because he thinks I'll get mad and that I should be more attentive to his needs and willing to fulfill them. I should ask him daily if there is anything I can do for him and do it as soon as possible. }

The Love Dare -Day Four

Day Four - Love is Thoughtful

How precious also are Your thoughts to me...How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand.

Psalm 139:17-18

Love is not a mindless feeling that rides on waves of emotions and falls asleep mentally. Love thinks -it keeps busy in thought, knowing that loving thoughts precede loving actions.

When you first met your spouse you brainstormed all the time about ways you could be thoughtful. You thought about them all day long and dreamed of them at night. Once you got married things changed though. You drifted off into focusing on everything else-job, house, kids, activities, etc. After awhile, you unintentionally begin to ignore the needs of your man.

If you don't learn to be thoughtful, you end up regretting missed opportunities to demonstrate love. Thoughtlessness is a silent enemy to a loving relationship.

A woman can think about multiple things at once. This allows her to complete many actions at a time. Men, on the other hand, can focus on one thing and forget about the rest of the world. A woman usually also thinks about all the people that are involved with what she is working on. This is how God designed women to complete men -but these differences also create opportunities for misunderstandings.

A couple must understand this about one another or risk an endless fallout of disagreements. He wonders why she doesn't just come out and say exactly what is on her mind. She thinks he inconsiderate and doesn't put stuff together to figure it out.

Women will get upset with their husbands but not tell them why. In our mind we think we shouldn't have to spell it out for him -he should be able to look at the situation and know what's going on. At the same time, he's upset because he can't read your mind and wonders why he is being punished for a crime he didn't know he committed.

Love requires thoughtfulness on both sides. The kind that builds bridges through patience, kindness, and selflessness. Love teaches you how to meet in the middle and respect the way your spouse thinks.

A wife should learn how to communicate truthfully and not say one thing and mean another. A husband should listen to his wife and be considerate of her unspoken thoughts. All too often we become angry and frustrated and say harsh words instead of thinking it through. We wait until later to wonder if we did the right thing. The problem with that is once the words are spoken they can not be taken back. Love filters harsh words out.

Great marriages come from great thinking. Spend some time today thinking about how you can better understand your spouse and demonstrate love. What need can you meet right now. What's the next event you could be preparing for?

Today's Dare:

Contact your spouse sometime during the business day. Have no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them?

What did you learn about yourself or your spouse by doing this today? How could this become a more natural part of your lifestyle?

{Yesterday's Dare for me: This wasn't the best day for us. If only day four came before day three. I went to the store at about 9:30 pm last night. I bought Drew and me a dessert to have together but when I got home all the kids were still out of the bed, kids were fighting, and Drew was on the phone. I got agitated because before I left I said it would be nice if they were in the bed before I got back. I didn't clearly ask him to put them in the bed...I assumed he would. While I was dealing with the kids fighting Drew went ahead to bed. So we didn't get to share our dessert...and out of annoyance I ate my part of it...I feel horrible today because of it...}

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